Children are amazing! They have unique talents and abilities and are bursting with confidence.
Until...we, the adults, get to them.
"Stop what you're doing!"
"Are you stupid?!"
"Come on, that's so simple, why can't you do it?!"
And we absolutely their confidence in our attempts at being 'smart' parents.
So, how do you instil confidence in your children? Well, here are a few tips to get you started...
1. Show them affection. Genuine affection. Surprise them with things they like - to do with you! When a child knows they have your time and support, they become confident in themselves. And showing genuine affection is one of the best ways of disciplining your child because it comes from a place of love, not anger or disappointment.
2. Give them attention. Genuine attention. When they seek your attention, give it to them wholeheartedly. But not only when they seek it, perhaps when they least expect it. Listening to them attentively, engaging them in conversation, seeking their opinion and humouring them are all examples of good attention giving. Giving a child attention builds a sense of worth in them which in turn is crucial for their confidence.
3. Appreciate them. For their efforts and not necessarily their results. Allow them to make mistakes and mentor them to improve themselves. Appreciation has a unique place in building confidence because it makes a child feels valued for who they are and the effort they make.
4. Teach them to set goals and then help them set meaningful, realistic and achievable goals. This will instil discipline and a goal oriented approach to life. And, of course, when the goals are achieved, celebrate with them...and set new ones!
5. Get them to start a gratitude diary and to write in it every day. It is especially important that they include in this positive things others have said about them and to them. There is no better way to gain an immediate injection of enthusiasm than by reading the good things others have said about you.
Happy confidence building and make sure you share your own ideas and thoughts below.
Until...we, the adults, get to them.
"Stop what you're doing!"
"Are you stupid?!"
"Come on, that's so simple, why can't you do it?!"
And we absolutely their confidence in our attempts at being 'smart' parents.
So, how do you instil confidence in your children? Well, here are a few tips to get you started...
1. Show them affection. Genuine affection. Surprise them with things they like - to do with you! When a child knows they have your time and support, they become confident in themselves. And showing genuine affection is one of the best ways of disciplining your child because it comes from a place of love, not anger or disappointment.
2. Give them attention. Genuine attention. When they seek your attention, give it to them wholeheartedly. But not only when they seek it, perhaps when they least expect it. Listening to them attentively, engaging them in conversation, seeking their opinion and humouring them are all examples of good attention giving. Giving a child attention builds a sense of worth in them which in turn is crucial for their confidence.
3. Appreciate them. For their efforts and not necessarily their results. Allow them to make mistakes and mentor them to improve themselves. Appreciation has a unique place in building confidence because it makes a child feels valued for who they are and the effort they make.
4. Teach them to set goals and then help them set meaningful, realistic and achievable goals. This will instil discipline and a goal oriented approach to life. And, of course, when the goals are achieved, celebrate with them...and set new ones!
5. Get them to start a gratitude diary and to write in it every day. It is especially important that they include in this positive things others have said about them and to them. There is no better way to gain an immediate injection of enthusiasm than by reading the good things others have said about you.
Happy confidence building and make sure you share your own ideas and thoughts below.